Work has been pretty lame lately too. I worked last night and today too. Last night was really bad though. We had these two new guys working and they are complete assholes! They were messing around the entire time and didn't get anything done and were ignoring customers and it was really bad. One of my managers was yelling at them and is now probably gonna be firing them after she talks to the other managers about it. But yeah after she freaked out at them, I was in the back stockroom with her and she just broke down and started crying to me. She was really upset that the new guys were so disrespectful to her. And then she mumbled something about her mom, sister, and I think a boyfriend...but she was totally balling her eyes out and so I could hardly understand what she was saying exactly. I hugged her and it was a little awkward, but not so much. She just has such a low self-esteem and it is really confusing. I don't know what's going on with her, but I do know that she thinks she is unattractive, and even if I'm gay I can tell you that she is definitely not ugly! She is actually very good looking and she could get any guy she wanted! She also is pretty passive and quiet and it's really weird to have her as a manager because she should be more controlling and like a leader, but she's not so much of either of those things unfortunately. But she is incredibly nice and I love talking with her. She's cool.
Anyway, that was a really long story about nothing really. The main reason why I mentioned the assholes at work was because they were messing around, I offered to stay late and help my manager close up so she wouldn't have to stay all by herself finishing up with stuff. The problem with this is that I take the subway to work and the last train from where I work to the dorms at my university leaves 15 minutes after I was scheduled to get off. I thought that there were a few more trains for the night, but those later trains only run on Friday and Saturday nights... So because I stayed an extra half hour helping my manager close up, I missed the last train back home! I wore flip-flops and a light sweater to work and it was like 20 degrees outside and snowing a little bit! It was awful. It was about midnight when I realized the trains weren't gonna be coming so I tried getting ahold of someone at the dorms who could come pick me up, but no success! So I called up the Ex to see if he could come get me. And lucky for me, he did. It took him like 15 minutes to get downtown where I work, so I was fucking freezing my ass off by the time he picked me up. But I'm glad I called up the Ex because the Crush was with him! So I got to see the Crush last night. It was good.
Today I bought some really cool jeans. They're just the Levi's 511 skinny, faded black, slightly worn jeans, only $50 too! I've always wanted a pair of black jeans, and I finally have some. It's kind of pathetic, once again, but the jeans remind me of the Crush. He has a pair of black jeans that he wears a lot and his ass looks amazing in them and so I always drool all over him whenever he wears his black jeans. I don't know what it is, but there is something special about black jeans compared to blue ones... Maybe it's just that the Crush has a pair of black ones and he's the only guy I've really noticed that has a pair of black jeans that I know of...
So I asked my Mom the other day to rent the first season of Queer as Folk! I'm so excited because discs 3, 4, and 5 came in the mail today. For some reason the first two discs won't ship, oh well. So I'll stop by my mom's place tomorrow and pick them up and probably end up watching a few episodes tomorrow during my "study breaks..." I'm excited to see it. The only "gay" movies I've seen are Brokeback Mountain, Latter Days, and Boy Culture. I actually skipped seminary (a class you take in high school where you get released from school to go to a mormon-religion class...) one day to watch Brokeback Mountain ironically... But yeah I just watched Boy Culture yesterday. It was pretty good. The main character guy, X, oh my god! He is drop dead gorgeous am I right?! But yeah I just related to how they mentioned how a phase 1 fag is one who is first coming out and doesn't want to sleep with a lot of guys because he just wants to stay away from the whole "slut" image and wants to find a real love or something. I'm definitely fitting right in as a phase 1 fag! I've only had sex 4 times, 3 times with the first guy I hooked up who I'm fairly good friends with still, and then the other time was when I was totally drunk off my ass and hooked up with the Ex. But all 4 times happened in like a 2 week period... And that was about two months ago. Actually it was exactly two months ago today when I hooked up with the Ex! Okay, I guess technically it was October 14th because it was after midnight, but I went over to the Ex's place on the 13th, so I'm gonna call October 13th the night of the hook up. So yeah, that's kind of funny that I mentioned this on my two-month-sex-free anniversary! I'm definitely horny...
I cannot wait for this semester to be over with. I'm on a full-ride scholarship and I have to maintain a 3.7 GPA and I'm pretty sure I'll get at least that this first semester. I'm pretty sure I'll get an A in 3 of my 6 classes (it's like 15 credit hours...), and then most likely an A, mabye an -A, in the other three. That should be good enough right? I hope so...I worked my ass off this semester between the stress of coming out, school, work, friends, family, and then a slew of other things... So I'll have no school again until January 7th after my last final on Friday! I cannot wait! It will be so nice and relaxing not having to do anything for 3 weeks. Hopefully it will give me a chance to maybe get something going between the Crush and I...
Music: "I Hate Camera" by The Bird and The Bee
1 comment:
Boy Culture is one of my favortie gay movies and I was lucky to be one of the first to see it when it was released in theaters last year.
I like that part about the stages of being gay too. I also like the way it ended. :0)
Good Luck on your finals!
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